Over the past years, we have had the hopes of starting a family through adoption. There has been Wey, A., Baby A, H., M., Baby B, J., J., M., M., K., J., T., K., T., A., O., and Baby C. There was a glimmer of hope that any of these children might enter into our home and that we might call them our son or daughter, but none of these children were meant to be ours…every one hurt deeply…I still think about them frequently.
Long before we heard of any of these children, there was a child that we did call our own. Baby S. was with us from April-June 30, 2006. We got to dream about if it would be a boy or a girl, we got to read baby books about its development, we even got to see its heartbeat. For twelve glorious weeks, we did have a child of our own…for twelve wonderful weeks, our lives were normal and filled with joy…and then one day, that dream was over…this hurt deeply too…I still think about this frequently as well.
So today, June 30, we do remember the happiness that we experienced back in 2006; but we also reflect back on all of the hurt this journey has caused…unfortunately, the sadness so greatly overwhelms the happiness. When is it time to move on?
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9 comments:
my heart hurts for you-- thank you for sharing-- thinking of you tonight and sending much support and strength your way. praying too!
I know how difficult this journey has been for you. You will know when it is time to move on. I am going to email you.
~BethAnn
I think about Baby S a lot too, and he/she will always have a special place in all of our hearts. Hugs on this very difficult day and every day.
Love you and am sorry you are hurting.
Oh, I'm so sorry :( I really want this for you, but most importantly I hope you find peace with whatever path you take.
Best to you!!!
Harmony
Who knows what it is that leads some of our paths in such difficult directions. It can seem so unfair sometimes. I am sending you good thoughts and hope your path gets less rocky from here on out.
*HUGS* Praying you guys will receive some uplifting news soon!!
You don't need to move on. Baby S will always be with you and be a guardian angel to you & your new little one. Thinking about you - Rosemarie
Good question. It's a difficult journey to be sure.. ((hugs))
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